guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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