i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
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We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
I know her cup size but not her name....
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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