You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sick fucks of a feather flock together
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize