OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
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That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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