my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
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