I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
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