Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
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