Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Im part way to drunk.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize