its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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