Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize