i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
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