margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
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