I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
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