New invention idea: vibrating tampons
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
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