would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
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