at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
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you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BRING THE BAGELS
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
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