you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
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he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
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I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
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