I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Floor bacon is actually really good
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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