I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder me”
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize