honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize