All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
Whoa!!! Accidentally took a dump in chick's bathroom at Red Robin. 1 hr for coast to be clear. Women's farts sound like geese taking last breath. Liars.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
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