I hate all girls vehemently.
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Randomize