I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
Randomize