i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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