But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
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seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
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Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
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