that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
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