gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
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I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
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Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
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