I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone shattered a urinal.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
Randomize