i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
Sex in the backyard? Check.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize