I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
either way he was missing a nipple.
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When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
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The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
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