This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
How does it feel to date your dad?
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize