Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Nautical themed porn is also great bc someone usually wears a captains hat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
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