i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
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