It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
defrosting a beer in the microwave. no sparks so far.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize