Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
I wear drunk well.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize