You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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