Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
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