Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
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If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
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Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
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