Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
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