i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
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