i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
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