but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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