They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
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