Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
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