nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
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