No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
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I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
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YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
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