maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
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I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
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Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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