yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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