Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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