Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Randomize